 GREY'S ANATOMY CRITIQUE or MEREDITH YOU IGNORANT SLUT
But Amy
loves it. Half of you probably love
it. It’s catnip to anyone with two X
chromosomes. It’s some
sort of estrogenic phenomena. And why
not? The two-and-a-half-hundred pound ortho-ogre
femme is called the “hottie.” The gay
guy is the perfect boyfriend. Millionaire
hunks who can’t have sex with you (apparently only interns and attendings are
allowed to bump uglies) give you all their money after you put them in cardiac
arrest and kill them (looking at you IZZY).
If you sleep with three of your married boyfriend’s associates, he still
doth protest when his sister calls you “slutty.” And every show features some reproductive
anomaly, poor child, or baby in jeopardy story. What I
really hate is patients asking if things are really like “Grey’s” in the
hospital. It’s worse than the Scrubs or
ER questions. Those shows in comparison
are like The Word of God compared to the Bazooka Joe crap on Grey’s Crapatomy. Anyways,
I decided to sit through an entire episode and log the more true and more false
aspects of a random episode. I know it’s
all TV fantasy and I know a “real doctor” is involved with the writing on the
show but what the hell. Let’s get a
second opinion here.
This is
the show where Christina, played by Sandra Oh, is erasing and adding names to
the OR scheduling board like she is sleeping with the boss or someth – oh,
right. About Sandra Oh, great actress,
but most unattractive woman on primetime. There are Corean golfers, pool hustlers, and
harabujis (grandpas) that are more attractive than her. But again, this is all a testament to her
fine acting ability proving that she can indeed act her way out of the paper
bag people must be trying to put over her head. TRUE - You know that largish, ogrish, dark-haired
female ortho resident? That's realistic.
I'll give them that. Hammering and
drilling human bone does tend to favor hardier frames. That's why three out of four ex-football players turned
surgeons prefer ortho. Well, that and the
fact that you don't have to think as much.
Kidding! It's really four out of four ex-football players. FALSE -
Surgeons reading a chart outside the ER, by the ambulance? And the patient isn’t even bleeding, inside
or out? To the triage you go girl (even
if you are better looking than the only other Asian on the show). I could have just stopped after “surgeons
reading a chart” with this one actually. SEX IN THE GURNEY -
Meredith Grey is an intern who has slept with three attendings, and one other intern
on the show during her first year. Once
is a scandal. Twice is expulsion from
the residency program. Three times is possibly
an STD and/or a Whore Merit Badge.
Four? You get your own TV show! FALSE -
What is up with McDreamy's sister catching up with every doctor on the
floor? And what is up with all these
docs doing more talking than thinking or working? Don't these people have work to do? There isn’t a billing code for emotes, trust me on this.
UNCERTAIN
- Two interracial relationships in this episode and BOTH are african-american
males with asian-american females. Who
co-writes this stuff? Wesley Snipes? And the new girl has two uteruses. Maybe Sandra Oh's character has two
testicles. That would close a plot hole
or two. QUESTIONABLE
- Asian Alien Girl with Two Uteruses is revealed to have cheated one night on
her newlywed husband and gets the morally-depraved riot act. Meredith Grey is a whore times four and is
the show's darling who dare not be called a “slut.” FALSE -
Izzy confronts Meredith about her patient’s odd response to her easy recovery in
time for the bar exam. Izzy should go
into psychiatry not surgery. (Actually she should probably get jail time for
what she did to that heart patient last season.
I bet she’d be worth TWO cartons of cigs.) In real life, surgery would transfer this
crazy patient to the Medicine service faster than you can write “Complex
medical problem. No surgical diagnosis.”
DIAGNOSIS
OF THE YEAR - "Everything is not about you, Meredith." – Christina,
played by Sandra Oh. I take back
everything bad I said about Sandra Oh. I
love her now. That line sounds like a
good name for this show. THE
JUNIOR MINTS FALLACY - What's up with all these television show O.R.'s being as
large as sports arenas with audience members. Especially the double-decker ones. ALL OF
THE ABOVE – Izzy and Meredith take the Munchausen's freak to the top
floor. The psych floor really is the top
floor of every hospital I've ever been at.
Good place for people who are tempted to jump out of a window. Don’t worry though; the windows are reinforced
plastic, they won’t get through. They’ll
just have an intracranial hemorrhage and head trauma and get turfed to the neurosurgery
service. I am onto your schemes, Dr.
Grey. LIVE AND
LET DIE – End of show, McDreamy is running up the stairwell at night. In my experience, if you are a physician and you are
running up a hospital stairwell and it is evening, then there is probably somewhere
you have to be STAT. So of course, Mer
and McD catch up on some romantic muzac conversation. Ah, that patient he was rushing to probably
would have died anyways. That’s it
for now. Amy probably won’t let me watch
the show with her again after this. And now, back to the happy place.    Oh, my cam is partially working occasionally and sometimes. Perhaps. Or will be. I think. PREVIOUS / MAIN / GALLERY / CAM / BIO / NOTIFY / FAQ / NEXT EMAIL: scott_to_trot[at]msn[dot]com |